so they’ll have an erotic charge

Yeah, in particular, probably my favorite goes to kind of activities involving humiliation and that’s something I really enjoy. A lot of the humiliation is kind of centered around kind of bringing up my perceived flaws as a man and my perceived lack of masculinity and kind of like my insecurities around my kind of sexual inadequacy or perceived sexual inadequacy. The more I’ve been watching your stuff and about kind of embracing your masculinity and particularly—I read The Tapping Solution by Nick Ortner and it really got me thinking about roots and root causes of things and one thing about things restarted. Learn more at and

Actually, you don’t have to live with that, you don’t have to live with these root causes. The negative emotional charge can be knocked out of your system and replaced with all positive feelings of security and that sort of thing. I’m thinking really, is it really in my best interest to kind of embrace something like humiliation or is probably maybe worth more looking at the cause? KIM: That’s a good question. In the BDSM play world and in conscious BDSM, I think it’s a place to expunge demons. Sometimes if you act these things out, you can get rid of them, you can expunge them. It depends, I would say, if you’re someone who is also doing—I mean, look, our fantasies, some of our arousal comes from unexpressed, unconscious elements of ourselves that need a place to emerge and so they’ll have an erotic charge to them as a signal almost to the psyche to be able to bring them out. If you are at the same time as these other explorations, doing your personal work, looking at the source, at the roots, as you’re saying, of potential issues and then consciously working on shifting them, then I would perhaps expect—you may see a shift in your lust or your erotic desires as a result of that. They’ll guide you. I’d say that the more you—the biggest change, I think, comes out of the conscious work that we do. Say if you’re using some tapping phrases to find some charged issues in you and then you’re doing the tapping to shift them, you may observe that things change in your desires. If you’re doing both kind of at the same time, I always believe as long as you’re using this conscious light of illumination and self-examination, that you’ll be guided to your next steps accordingly. If there was something that becomes kind of an addiction, like we’ve talked about porn throughout this salon, then I’d say you need to exact more conscious steps to break those patterns once they start to rewire you in a different way that’s unhealthy. Otherwise, you can look at your desires as ways of bringing out demons, expunging demons, or showing you where there might be more work to do. Yeah. I mean, I haven’t got—well, I didn’t even know I was going to share this to this point, but I kind of thought I can now. Yeah, at the beginning of this salon, that was about four, five weeks ago now, maybe a big longer, I just thought, you know what? It’s probably best that I just to kind of calm down my system really and just kind of desensitize myself to the idea. Learn more at

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